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When ever we say something, there is usually some emotion associated with it.
For example – our statements could be happy, sad, full of excitement, resentment or fear.
Our words could be mischievous, loving, harsh, rude, gentle, informative or blunt.
We could make a point directly or indirectly.
And at times, we may talk by remaining silent! 🙂
In order for our message to not get garbled or misunderstood, it is important for the other person to understand the emotion behind the dialogue also.
When we meet new people, we take time to understand their ways of talking, expressing, appreciating, denying or arguing. If we are able to build bridges and not walls, we become friends! However, if the message is interpreted in a wrong way, a lot of time and effort goes into correcting it.
The lower our ego levels are and the more accepting we are of any situation, the easier it is to understand other people.
Once, you understand what they are saying and why they are saying it – what is the motto behind the conversation – things become clearer.
Let’s take an example. There are two people who are very hardworking. They are working on the same project and want it to be successful. Every time they talk about a process improvement on the project, there can be agreement or discord. However, as long as the purpose is clear, they can reach a conclusion. They can brainstorm ideas and discuss the pros and cons.
Once the ego barrier is broken, the purpose is clear in the minds of all people and things move further.
Incomplete or Unending Conversations exist, when there is no conclusion and no radical decision can be reached ‘together’ by all counterparts.
There are hundreds of books written on communicating effectively. And, all of them have many things in common. If it’s important for a speaker to share his thought with the exact emotion, it is also the job of the listener to interpret it with the same exact emotion.
Communication is a two way street and if it’s purposeful, it can get a lot of work done magically!
There is a famous hindi quote by a very famous writer, Kabir: (English translation follows!)
Like a cool breeze in summer, for others and self to enjoy.